the difficulty in leaving

"It may be possible for each to think too much of his own potential glory hereafter; it is hardly possible for him to think too often or too deeply about that of his neighbour. The load, or weight, or burden of my neighbour's glory should be laid on my back, a load so heavy that only humility can carry it, and the backs of the proud will be broken. It is a serious thing to live in a society of possible gods and goddesses, to remember that the dullest and most uninteresting person you can talk to may one day be a creature which, if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship, or else a horror and corruption such as you now meet, if at all, only in a nightmare. All day long we are, in some degree, helping each other to one or other of these destinations. It is in the light of these overwhelming possibilities, it is with the awe and the circumspection proper to them, that we should conduct all our dealings with one another, all friendships, all loves, all play, all politics. There are no ordinary people. You have never talked to a mere mortal. Nations, cultures, arts, civilisations--these are mortal, and their life is to ours as the life of a gnat. But it is immortals whom we joke with, work with, marry, snub, and exploit--immortal horrors or everlasting splendours. This does not mean that we are to be perpetually solemn. We must play. But our merriment must be of that kind (and it is, in fact, the merriest kind) which exists between people who have, from the outset, taken each other seriously--no flippancy, no superiority, no presumption. And our charity must be a real and costly love, with deep feeling for the sins in spite of which we love the sinner--no mere tolerance, or indulgence which parodies love as flippancy parodies merriment. Next to the Blessed Sacrament itself, your neighbour is the holiest object presented to your senses. If he is your Christian neighbour, he is holy in almost the same way, for in him also Christ _vere latitat_--the glorifier and the glorified, Glory Himself, is truly hidden."

Something that comes to mind in these last few days in St. Louis

A friend once told me that a friend is, loosely speaking,"not someone you love but someone who loves you" and that, furthermore, a friendship is "a covenanted relationship that binds people together as surrogate family."

Thank God for friends, praise God for family.

Elementary Lessons after Undergraduate Graduation

I remember hosting a summer Bible Study one week at my house during high school. My youth group, needless to say, did not do a very good job of keeping things clean. In addition, most of my relationships in youth group were not very substantial. Many of the people I had grown up with had been replaced by a completely different group by my junior and senior years in high school. I had very few if any deep connections. Taking into consideration these two things, I became extremely agitated and upset at them. Furthermore, I became frustrated at the fact that something seemingly so simple as letting people come over to my house had become such a burden. Why was it this difficult? Why did I have to be so meticulous and uptight? I remember expressing these sentiments and many more to my youth pastor afterwards, and, in the midst of the conversation he asked me, "But do you love them?" to which I replied "I want to...if I don't now, I really want to be able to say that I do."

These last few days, it's been nice having people crash our place on their way in and out of St. Louis; there's a sense of home and hearth that the dorms will never replicate. At this same time, this has reminded me of my own reluctance to give up my own comforts. This includes everything from offering food that my mother has brought from home to needing to be quiet when people decide to sleep early. Whether I get anxious over the increasingly cluttered nature of the apartment or simply wishing that I could have friends over for dinner without feeling the need to cook for an additional 3-4 people that I don't know as well, I am learning that to be hospitable is not simply doing what I already want to do (like hosting people I would already enjoy hosting) or giving up something that I'm already accustomed to giving, but it is intentionally and willingly offering up that which I value so that Christ can be honored more.

I have been blessed to have so many friends that are generous with their money, time, and possessions, and I hope and pray that I will continue to learn to do the same.

Current Status

Setting: Arts and Sciences Computer Lab Printing Pick-up Counter

Student Clerk: So does anyone have a job that they're waiting on?
Me: Yeah, I do. I printed from the one-sided printing station. It should 11 pages.
Student Clerk: Okay, let me see...is it the one called Russian...Death?
Me: (after slight pause) Yeah, that's it...and I know you're just dying to read it.

Student Clerk smirks

Two exams and one paper to go.